You teach others how to treat you...
How to not to let how someone treats you deplete your energy.
Do you have that one friend or family member that is constantly negative and talking in circles around their issues? Listening to them can create a physical sense of your energy draining.
In life some people choose us and some we choose. The ones that choose us are the ones that seem to keep coming back to you and venting their energy and issues.
When applying The Four Agreements (author:Don Miguel Ruiz) to this situation the thought process is as follows.....
"I'm hearing it in her voice, she is hitting my buttons. Anything I say to help she thwarts in the direction of distracting to the next negative issue, and so on and so on.... I need to gain authority over myself and ask to be protected by the negative energy field that is pressing on me and changing my mood.
I don't need to worry that I cannot solve it for her, I am only here to give love. I am not here to judge, I am here to thrive and be a light-worker who reacts always and only from love (to the best of my ability).
Sometimes I am caught off guard and I find I've been mobilized into old patterns of trying to fix someone who is in resistance and fear to their own future. This is her story, the chapter I can play in it is giving love unconditionally.
What do I do as she is speaking? I am looking at her in the moment and I am listening... Then I Respond that I heard her, and then I change the subject, because she is just venting out at the world and not me.
Because I know this, I am able to be patient in listening and then I change the subject.
This process may happen through out the entire visit, but I am aware and because I am aware, I am able to respond from a place of love instead of impatience, judgement, hurt feelings, defensive words and angry thoughts and resentments later.
These all go away when I know I am not there to fix, but to love. One day, one hour at a time. Every time I do this she ends up empty, nothing more to say and then I fill her with love. I speak calmly and I touch and hug and encourage. I walk away feeling lighter, happier, kinder and calm. I am energized because I am full of mind joy from being impeccable with my word"
Remember you teach others how to treat you!
Try this next time you need to be around someone that you love and cannot change, but they need to be in your life. The serenity prayer is a real helper in these moments.
See your energy on the Lighter Side ...
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